Are You Up to Doing Something Scary?

I had an insight this morning. I was pondering the areas of my life that are not coming together, where solutions are not presenting themselves, and no matter how much I want it to be different, these areas are stagnant. Then it occurred to me, if I am to get what I want I can no longer operate at the level I am currently living at. Meaning, if life is a game, I have to play a bigger game if I am to come into contact with the people and resources I need to achieve my goals.

There comes a point where life seems to dry up. It’s not that there is anything wrong; it’s just that you have outgrown the game you are currently playing. When you started playing at the level you are in now it was challenging and you had to grow. And you did. And now you have mastered this level. But the rewards at this level are no longer satisfying and it’s going to take playing a bigger game to give you access to new rewards. The reason you may be hesitating here is because it’s scary to try something new when success is not guaranteed. Sometimes it’s healthy to hesitate and it gives you some time to make a plan. To begin making that plan, consider the following:

1. Where are you experiencing disappointed in your life? Where do things not seem to be making any progress?

2. Ideally, what do want this area to look like? Describe it in detail.

3. What skills or knowledge do you need to make that happen?

4. What qualities do you need to embody (i.e. confidence, open-mindedness, calm, etc.)?

5. What can you do to obtain the skills, knowledge and qualities that are so necessary?

6. What type of people (mentors, coaches, friends, business associates) do you need to surround yourself with? How can you find them? Who is on your team? Who is off the team? In this process consider who motivates you and who drains your energy.

7. What do you need to begin saying no to in order to allow space for new things to come in?

When you have finished answering these questions put your answer to #2 somewhere you can see it. Make it as fancy as you like and if you are into it make a vision board. Second, begin the process of removing items from #7 from your calendar. Commit to the “no.” It may not be easy at first but if you wrote it down you recognized it was necessary. Third, pull out all the action items from #5 and make time-sensitive goals for completing each one. Lastly, begin pursuing and being in relationship with people you have identified in #6. That list should include an accountability partner. This is the person that you check in with on a regular basis (weekly is best) to give a progress report on your goals. It’s important that this person know that they are not to make excuses for you if you’ve fallen off. Nor does an accountability partner act as a disciplinarian. They play the role of witness. They are the observer that helps to keep you straight.

The idea of playing a bigger game can be a little daunting. You’re going to do things you haven’t done before and there are going to be mistakes made along the way. That’s okay, it is how you learn and grow. Learn from the mistakes and add it to your plan. Because here’s the thing, and it’s the reason why you’ll push through the fear: the rewards of playing a bigger game are exponentially greater than the challenges. Look again at your answer to #2. Awesome things that you haven’t imagined or planned for are going to come as a result of you moving forward. Believe you can do it, because the reality is you’ve been continually and successfully taking on bigger games all your life.