Tips to develop emotional intelligence

Master Your Mind: 3 Tips to Help You Achieve Your Big Goals

The following is a guest post by Stephanie Trager, JD. Stephanie is a business strategist and soul success coach, and founder of of Intentional Paradigms, LLC. Read the first post in this two-part series here.

1. Crazy Honest Self- Inquiry into Cause:

A great thought leader, Maxwell Maltz, creator of Psychocybernetics, declared many decades ago, “there should be mind watchers!” We have weight watchers, house watchers, guards at all ports of entry into this country, cyber watchers, why not put some attention on the greatest creator in all of mankind – the mind!

Our minds are the cause of effect. Our minds generate all truths we believe about ourselves and everyone else around us. We all have beliefs about ourselves and how the world works. These beliefs set in action the chain of events that create our lives and the circumstances (effects) that support or inhibit our personal goal achievement.

To be specific, what’s one goal you’d like to achieve that feels like a giant stretch and is something you just haven’t mastered yet?

Now you’re deciding you want to master it.

Our mind is the most important organ, tool, banker, guard, and creator on this planet. Our minds are creating all of reality collectively and individually.

When we become sufficiently keen on what’s really going on in our mind and our world of manifestation from the inside out, we understand what steps we must take to leverage and wield the infinite power we have been given.

To begin, it takes dedicated practice, control of the mind. If you are at least in your thirties, you’ve got some default mind games going on. To make lasting change first accept it may take time, commitment, and determination to change your default mind patterns.

Can you commit to Crazy Honest Self Inquiry?

As humans we really are only using a fraction of our capacity, physically, mentally and spiritually. When you commit to a Crazy Honest Self Inquiry and take full responsibility for why you haven’t yet mastered or achieved the goal you keep setting your mind upon, be willing to go deep, call a spade a spade, an effect an effect, and trace all effects to the Cause. When you nail the cause, you will experience real results.

Tips to develop emotional intelligence

2. Carve Out Time for Mind Exercises

Mind exercises give you control of the most powerful master keyboard on the planet. Mind exercises also allow you to reprogram any limiting beliefs and cultivate more power to create the effects (outcomes) you wish to see in your life.

Here’s a sample Mind Exercise that may be useful for investigating the cause of what may be keeping you from some or all of your goals.

To make the most of mind exercises you must be consistent. It helps to have some structure at the beginning. For today, let’s say there is something you fear. Maybe you fear being rejected so you’re not making the call or saying what needs to be said.

If you’ve done TIP 1: Crazy Honest Self Inquiry into the Cause, this mind exercise will be very productive.

If it works, do it again tomorrow – and again every single day!

1. Find a comfortable place to sit, undisturbed, preferably in quiet where you can return daily.
2. Set your phone to quiet and turn the timer on for 5 minutes
3. For five minutes sit and clear your thoughts. When thoughts come in, find your neutral. This is a personal exercise, so you must find your own neutral coordinates- notice how they feel, appear, sound, or look to you and just be there.
4. Sit for five minutes and watch thoughts come in and develop your capacity to kick them out. Even good thoughts. This exercise is for the purpose of gaining control of your mind to find neutral.

This may seem hokey if you’re not used to ‘playing around.’ Or you may think you don’t have time for this kind of game or that you don’t meditate.

The game of your mind will play you if you don’t play it. This exercise is extremely powerful.

Beliefs don’t disappear instantly (99% of the time). If you employ a strategy like the mind exercise, you absolutely will nail the cause of limiting beliefs that may be keeping you from your full potential.

3. Employ Your Set of ‘Mind Watcher’ Guards

How to master your mind

Mind Watcher Guards are on your personal success team. If you thought Tip #2 Carve Out Time for Mind Exercises was hokey, this may feel even more weird. Notice that defense and stomp on it. Mind Watchers are your success team and the most powerful tool you can employ to achieve the goal you secretly fear you will fail at again.

Mind Watchers as noted above were first mentioned by Maxwell Maltz, the creator and genius behind “Psychocyberntics” (highly recommend this book). We all have a set point for what we believe is possible. When it comes to leadership, persuasion, power, income, love…you name it… we have a ceiling we hover beneath.

The ceiling is the limiting belief and usually the hidden cause behind everything we create in our lives. In order to break the ceiling, we’ve got to be aware of subconscious patterns that run the backstory of our mind.

Here’s an exercise to Employ Your Set of Mind Watcher Guards. The objective is to keep that limiting belief from causing failed outcomes or missed goals – and ultimately, to dissolve the limiting belief for good.

1. Set your timer again for 5 minutes, sit comfortably, close your eyes and quiet your mind. Find those neutral coordinates you set in the the previous exercise.
2. Now bring your attention to the CAUSE you identified in Tip #1 your Honest Self Inquiry (usually a belief about yourself.)
3. Notice how your belief hinders you from reaching the goal you’ve set or how it COULD hinder you going forward. Bring all possibilities to mind. FOCUS here.
4. Have a conversation with that belief in your mind.
5. Next call in your Mind Watcher Guards and if you can visualize this, have them cage this belief and disarm it from all its power.
6. Allow yourself to play around here (if you’re finding it difficult to visualize, keep practicing finding neutral and slowly introduce parts of this exercise).

Master your mind or what’s hidden inside will master you!

Stephanie Trager is the Founder of Intentional Paradigms, LLC. and works with business leaders and entrepreneurs to embody their next level of success, embrace their inner purpose, and become the influential leader they are in all areas of their lives. Dubbed the ‘Shaman Lawyer Business Coach’, she helps her clients leverage their assets, unique gifts and position their talents for more impact, joy and purpose in their lives.

Tell us: If you’ve had a chance to try the exercises above, which did you find most helpful?


Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to DoingA simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.

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  1. Team Coaching Zone

    Liked that idea of “Mind Watchers!” It’s so true! I’m going to try the 5 minute mind exercise. I always thought meditation might be helpful to slow my mind down but never knew where to start. This seems like a perfect exercise to get started. Thanks Jodi!

  2. FireStarters

    I’ve been looking forward to this article. This hits home from it, “Now you’re deciding you want to master it.” Once making that commitment, it’s such a game changer. Thanks for the great inspiration and your wisdom shared Stephanie.

  3. Pedro J. Gomez

    Incredibly powerful post. I intend to embrace your valuable suggestions. Thank you!

  4. I like that you layout steps for mediation without calling it meditation as some people are instantly turned off by the ideas of it. Great article!

  5. A remedy for easing the grasp of “limiting beliefs” – I’m bookmarking this one to keep it handy.

  6. Rebecca Jorgensen

    Thanks Jodi. I love Maltz. I grew up on Psychocybernetics. My mom was a self-help junkie and I was reading Maltz instead of doing my 9th grade biology homework. It’s no wonder I ended up with a PhD in Clinical Psychology. haha Learning ways to get to know what holds us back and how to tame our inner critic – or employ our Mind Watcher – is so important to success.

  7. Thanks for all the exercises. I spend time exercising my body regularly, why oh why do I neglect the mind? I’ll give these a try…

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